


A Very Good Place to Start

by msgenevieve



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Expanded Canon, F/M, Gen, Killian/Belle friendship, Missing Scene, post-411
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-09
Updated: 2015-04-09
Packaged: 2018-03-22 01:24:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 631
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3709663
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/msgenevieve/pseuds/msgenevieve
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It’s not the first time he’s been spared due to the bravery of his enemy’s woman, and he knows that such an undeniable truth must be burning a hole in what’s left of the Dark One’s soul. (Takes place the day after the events of 411 - please note, this is not really a Rumbelle story.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Very Good Place to Start

**Author's Note:**

  * For [gentlesleaze](https://archiveofourown.org/users/gentlesleaze/gifts).



> A belated birthday gift for gentlesleaze, who brightens my dash every single day. I hope you had a wonderful birthday, and I hope that my very first attempt at writing Belle isn’t a complete disaster. *hugs you*

~*~

 

The Crocodile’s wife saves his life.  

Of course, it’s not the first time he’s been spared due the bravery of his enemy’s woman, and he knows that such an undeniable truth must be burning a hole in what’s left of the Dark One’s soul.  While he cannot help ruing the lost opportunity to avenge himself, it eases his own soul to know that the Crocodile has been banished.

Killian Jones knows all too well what happens when the Crocodile’s ego is dealt a blow.

He dreams of Milah that night. When he wakes, he can almost feel the ash of her crumpled heart against his cheek, tossed by the cold harbour winds.

He wants to seek out Belle, he realises. He never had the chance to thank Milah for her bravery, for her sacrifice.  He cannot bear to make the same mistake twice. He needs to make amends.  

Even if she blames him for the loss of her husband, he has to try.

Emma fusses over him gently (it’s been a very long time since someone made him feel cared for, let alone _cherished_ , and the simple touch of her hands is almost enough to make his eyes burn with tears) and asks more than once if he’s sure he’s feeling okay.

He kisses her softly (the taste of her mouth is all the sweeter now that he knows how close he came to oblivion) and assures her that he’s well enough, and that this is something he needs to do.

She understands.

She always does.

~*~

He comes to the library the day after Rumple is gone, and she can’t deny the pang that twists her heart at the sight of him.

Killian Jones and Rumple will always be eternally linked in her mind, and she knows she will never be able to see one without thinking of the other. Of course, there’s a very strong chance she will never see her husband again.  Another pang twists through her at the thought of Rumple, this one more complicated, sharp and heavy, tinged with regret and loss and grief. She wonders if this is what it feels like to be a widow, mourning the loss of a beloved husband.  

She wonders if it’s worse to be mourning someone who is still in the land of the living.  She wonders if her pulse will ever not quicken at the mention of his name.  If the hollow in her chest will ever stop feeling as though her _own_ heart is missing.

(Everyone keeps telling her how brave she was, but she’s never felt more aware of her own human frailties.)

When Killian pushes open the library door, his expression both hesitant and penitent, she thinks maybe there’s a way to take back her courage.  His gaze goes directly to the sorcerer’s hat, perched on the desk in front of her, his jaw tightening, and she sees the shame in his eyes.

She waits for him to speak. There are so many unspoken words between them that she can’t even _begin_ to guess the best place to start.

“Emma tells me you’re working on releasing the fairies from that wretched hat.”  Lifting his gaze from the desk at last, he looks at her steadily, his eyes as blue as the morning sky.  “I’d like to help you with your research.”

“Sure.”  Now that she’s not seeing everything through Rumple’s gaze, things are much easier to see for what they truly are, including Killian Jones.  “You’re surprisingly good at it.”  She attempts a tentative smile. “I remember.”

He flushes, rubbing the back of his neck with his good hand, then ducks his head. “Thank you.”

In the end, Belle thinks, it seems the words they needed to say to each other were very simple. “You’re welcome.”

 

~*~


End file.
